Rants

Posted on 8 Oct 2008 at 10:09

 

Gallery

...while Simon Brew takes a pop at arrogant dialog box writers.

There can't be a computer user on earth who hasn't at some point wanted to meet the presumptuous individual whose job it is to write pop-up boxes for software. Can you imagine the job ad? "Obnoxious, arrogant individual wanted to annoy our entire customer base. Manners not required." For away from the glare of any spyware application, these dialog boxes have a habit of shooting in when you least want them, be it an upgrade reminder, a request to register or even a simple information box that, when you see it, you can't help but think your life could have done without.

The intrusion starts earlier and earlier, I've discovered. One product I was tinkering with recently kicks off with a loading screen. That in itself wouldn't be a problem, were it not for the fact that said screen sits, beaming, on top of everything else, no matter how hard you protest. It was almost daring me to try to read my emails, safe in the knowledge that it would cover most of the screen, leaving me trying to peak around the borders. Even that might have been tolerable had it not been for the fact that the program took a good minute or so to load. Not long in the real world, granted, but a lifetime in the land of computing.

Then there's the pop-up in the corner of your screen, a tactic practised by a handful of security software companies. You have important alerts! You need to download some stuff! The world is going to end! That kind of thing. The problem? That it becomes, without having the decency to ask your permission, the active window by default. I've lost count of the amount of times I've been tapping away, in the midst of a train of thought, only for a stream of consciousness to be lost thanks to an inconsiderate application.

Registering disgust

If I had to pick the worst thing, the one that sums up the breathtaking arrogance of some software companies, it's the registration window. Again, I've no problem if a software company asks if I wish to register its product. But when the only options are 'Register now' or 'Register later', you can bet the contents of my hard disk that there's no way in hell I'll opt for the former. What other business would assume that the customer was going to register at all? How ridiculously full of themselves are said companies not to offer any option to decline to register? If anyone ever invents a mod that by default adds a 'Never register in my entire life' option to every application, I'll gladly keep them in pints for a good evening or two.

As for the software companies who are guilty of such practices: just remember, it costs nothing to ask nicely, say please and accept the answer that the customer who pays your bills has given you. You might even find more people take you up on your offers as a result.

Author: Simon Brew